As a dad, can I get full custody of my child?
In the past, family law judges tended to award mothers primary custody while relegating dads to weekend visitations or long visits in the summer. While this arrangement might still work for some families, the reality is that there are all different kinds of families living in Washington, and they all have unique needs. For example, maybe you are one of the many other fathers who are currently seeking full custody of your child.
Even as attitudes toward joint parenting have evolved, you might still meet some resistance as a father who is asking for full custody. This is true even if you have legitimate reasons for thinking your child would have better support with just you rather than both parents. Safety concerns are just one reason that parents of both genders tend to cite when seeking full custody.
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Are you prepared for full custody?
Having full custody of your child is an enormous undertaking. As the sole custodian, you would be responsible for your child’s life all day, every day. If this is what is best for your child and you are prepared to take on that responsibility, that is great.
However, you want to be sure that you are not using child custody to hurt your ex. Trying to get custody to get back at your wife for leaving you for another person will only backfire. Child custody should always be about your child, and not you or your ex’s desire to punish one another.
Do finances matter?
Maybe you hope that having a high-earning job and a good credit score will put you on a better path to getting full custody. This is not necessarily the case, even if your ex earns significantly less and cannot offer the same level of financial support to your child. What is most important is whether you are an involved parent. Consider whether you do things like participate in your child’s:
- Education
- Extracurricular activities
- Medical needs
Ultimately, you need to demonstrate that you are an instrumental part of your child’s daily life. An easy action to take is to make sure that you are on your child’s class email list. You can also make sure you are being proactive with his or her health care needs by independently scheduling medical appointments or dentist visits.
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Stay positive
There is no reason to talk badly of your ex to your child. Demonizing your child’s other parent is one of the best ways to make a family law court think twice about awarding you full custody. Even if you do get custody, most courts still want both parents to be as involved as possible, which means you should still take steps to make sure your ex can see your child. Trash talking about your ex can also negatively affect your child.
If securing full custody is a priority, then you should be as prepared as possible for the upcoming task. Some parents can agree on child custody amicably, while others find that negotiating is out of the question and instead head to court. Although you may already be an active and involved parent, it is also helpful to learn as much as possible about Washington family law, too.
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