It’s a bit of a stereotype that only mothers are involved in their children’s schooling. Increasingly, both parents want to be more engaged in their child’s education. However, when those parents go through a divorce, does that mean one has to back off from community involvement? Perhaps and perhaps not.
You have a right to be involved.
California greatly prefers joint physical and legal custody. While shared physical custody is logistically challenging, it is conceptually simple: Whoever the child resides with for the majority of the time has physical custody. That parent is – for all practical purposes – responsible for the following:
- Health
- Housing
- Clothing
- Food
Yet, where physical custody seems straightforward in those senses above, legal custody is a very different issue.
When parents have joint legal custody, they both have the right to have information and involvement in the decisions about their kids in many places, but that includes education. If you wish to be a member of your child’s school community, you have the right, and you should.
Keeping it about the kids
One of the more entertaining things to read on the internet are posts about “Parent-teacher association (PTA) drama.” These sorts of posts generally involve a parent taking the lead in some initiative that is nominally about the school and bettering the lives of the students but quickly becomes about them.
However, there is a tried-and-true secret to making sure your PTA – whether your ex is involved or not – stays away from such tropes. That method is sticking to business. Parent Teacher Associations can do a lot of good, raising funds for the school, planning events, and even serving as advocacy places for necessary goods. However, if you or your ex use the PTA as a way to “prove” how involved you are as a parent, you’ve lost sight of the goal.
In every custody matter and in every parenting matter, you should focus on doing what’s right for your kids.