Getting caught in the middle of parents in a contentious divorce can be confusing and distressing for a child. A parent resorting to manipulative tactics to undermine the child’s relationship with the other parent could double that anguish.

While healthy co-parenting can provide a child with more stability, some parents in intense disputes may be unwilling or unable to get along. Some may even deliberately alienate their child from the other parent to gain an advantage in custody proceedings. However, a parent has the right to spend time with their child—even if the judge names them the non-custodial parent.

If you suspect that your spouse is turning your child against you, you can take legal steps to protect your parental rights.

Impact of parental alienation on your child

Parental alienation is a common tactic where one parent manipulates the child into distancing themself from the other by:

  • Making false or exaggerated claims
  • Openly badmouthing the other parent and encouraging disrespect
  • Limiting contact and withholding information
  • Conditioning dependency and forcing the child to choose between parents

Alienating parents often fail to consider its possible short-term and long-term effects on their child, which can include:

  • Poor academic performance
  • Social withdrawal and difficulties in forming healthy bonds
  • Engaging in risky behavior like substance abuse and early sexual activity
  • Anxiety and depression

Protecting your parental rights can be crucial for your child’s well-being if the court has not denied any.

Legal preventative measures

Parents must work together to give the child adequate support as they process this significant change in the family dynamic. Some of the ways to mitigate and address parental alienation include:

  • Enforcing custody orders:Both parents must comply with visitation schedules and custody agreements.
  • Modifying custody arrangements:The court can adjust the order by extending visitation and changing primary custody.
  • Going to court-ordered family therapy:Family therapy can create a neutral space for resolving issues and expressing concerns.
  • Facilitating reunification:Supervised visits and reunification therapy are some options that can help rebuild the parent-child bond.
  • Filing a contempt of court or criminal charge:In severe cases, a parent can pursue civil remedies to hold the other accountable. In California, parental alienation is not a crime. However, you can file a separate criminal charge if the other parent is abusing the child to enforce alienation.

Protecting the parent-child bond can be essential in creating a healthy environment for your child. It helps to remember that your family doesn’t have to navigate the challenges of divorce and potential alienation alone. Counselors, mental health providers and family law attorneys can help develop healthy strategies for families dealing with divorce.
In cases of suspected parental alienation by a parent unwilling to resolve it, consulting a family law attorney can help determine options for pursuing or strengthening a case.